In an attempt to become more like the shiksa yentas of their dreams, Nico and Patrick have developed a questionnaire for willing writers to fill out. They feel this will help showcase the writer’s stellar assets and get them laid/meet wonderful people. The writers of In Our Words deserve nice things.
When did you stop believing in Santa Claus?
i stopped believing in Santa Claus the very moment someone told me about Santa Claus.
What famous person epitomizes your ideal mate and why?
My ideal mate is both not famous and not a “mate.” But, for the sake of argument, Jonsi, because he doesn’t conform to musical norms (and i’m assuming others), because he is artistically gorgeous when in love, and because he has a wide-eyed childish awe that is only met by the depth of his pain.
What you think is our culture’s biggest hang up with sex and dating?
i think our culture’s biggest hang up regarding sex is that it’s considered taboo/private and that there’s a lack of knowledge around the idea of consent. i think our culture’s biggest hang up regarding dating is that communication skills aren’t culturally valued, leaving so many folks in binds they don’t know how to remedy.
How do you think we can foster world peace?
We can start by assuming we know nothing about each other and having open conversations. We can cultivate compassion as a cultural value. We can stop thinking things should be done for the greater good and start making decisions based on what’s best for the most marginalized.
What are you long-term goals?
To be organized, to write, to love, to smile. In a lot of ways, i’m already there.
If you had to stay in on a Friday night alone or with someone special, how would you spend it?
i’d like to cuddle and read, listen to music, to talk about big things and little things, to laugh. All of this would ideally be interspersed with sex and kisses.
When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
i wanted to be a princess. Later i wanted to be a punk. i’m both.
What turns you on in a sex partner?
The questions “Do you want me to ____?” and “Can I ____?” are maybe the hottest thing ever
What are the lessons you learned from your most significant relationship?
i learned that sometimes support means distance, that communication has to be bravely honest, that love and pain are permutations of the same emotion, to believe in hope, and that guilt is self-serving.
What’s your ideal first date?
Coffee followed by a stroll.
What are your dealbreakers in a partner?
Dishonesty, non-consent, hateful attitudes, and lack of engagement with the world.
What’s one thing you want to tell the world?
Be open to your own capacity to love. Let it wash over all other feelings and drives.
What TV show could you spend all day watching?
If you could be famous for only one thing, what would it be?
What would your superpower be?
How much is that doggy in the window?
That doggy should be free, by which i don’t just mean not commoditized, i also mean liberated.
At gunpoint, if you had to pick one of the current GOP candidates to be our future president, who would it be and why?
i would take the bullet because it would be the least violent possibility.
What was the first life lesson you ever learned?
The first life lesson i learned was to challenge anything that was put forward as Truth.
Big spoon or little spoon?
Typically, little spoon, but i can be a big spoon when somebody needs it.
What’s the most important thing to you in a relationship?
Very open communication.
Finish the phrase: I could never be with someone who:
Thinks that they have learned all they have to learn.