In an attempt to become more like the shiksa yentas of their dreams, Nico and Patrick have developed a questionnaire for willing writers to fill out. They feel this will help showcase the writer’s stellar assets and get them laid/meet wonderful people. The writers of In Our Words deserve nice things.
If this were a beauty pageant, how would you introduce yourself?
Probably by dancing a sparkly dance and twirling a plate of homemade cookies.
When did you stop believing in Santa Claus?
In second grade. I realized that Santa’s handwriting was strikingly similar to mom’s. When I asked my daddy if Santa was real, he just laughed and said no.
What’s something that almost no one knows or that you usually don’t tell people about yourself?
Before I hated the Twilight series, I liked it a little bit. Shhh, don’t tell anyone.
How do you think we can foster world peace?
Peace starts in the home, folks. I think the simple act of respecting individuals as human beings makes a big difference. Also, we can be aware of the language we use. You’d be surprised how many violent phrases linger in our vernacular.
What are you long-term goals?
To figure out how the heck my talents meet the world’s greatest need. Also, to be a Broadway performer who owns a bakery that is a food program by day and blues venue by night. Too much?
If you had to stay in on a Friday night alone or with someone special, how would you spend it?
Curled up with a blanket and my teddy bear listening to music or reading a good book.
When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be a doctor and a mommy. All too soon, I came to discover that I’m not only awful at science, but I’m also terrified of marriage. Perhaps it’s time for a new childhood dream.
What turns you on in a sex partner?
A genuine smile, crazy awesome dance moves, and an affinity for nerdy theological conversations.
Did your parents ever catch you having sex or masturbating?
Thank God, no.
If you had to marry one Jonas Brother, have sex with another and kill the third one, which would you choose?
Gross, I refuse to even think about that.
What are the lessons you learned from your most significant relationship?
I learned the importance of self-respect and that if a partner doesn’t respect your boundaries, he/she doesn’t deserve you.
What’s your ideal first date?
Hmmmm, I don’t know. Surprise me!
What are your dealbreakers in a partner?
Douchey, proud, bad listener, won’t sit through the movie Dirty Dancing
Are you a dog person or a cat person and why?
I’m definitely a dog person. They respond to their names, don’t claw off your face when you try to cuddle, and they don’t do their business in the house.
What’s one thing you want to tell the world?
Every human person is capable of love.
The Voice or American Idol?
I’ve never seen The Voice, so I guess that leaves Idol by default
Britney or Christina?
Christina redeemed herself with her big band phase. Plus, she has a phenomenal set of pipes.
What TV show could you spend all day watching?
How much is that doggy in the window?
$7.23- He’s on sale
Big spoon or little spoon?