by: Nico Lang
1. When they text you back right away.
2. When they say, “No, it’s your turn.”
3. When you’re at home in your unsexiest clothes and it still gets them in the mood.
4. When your laundry — the one chore you truly hate — has mysteriously folded itself.
5. When they are wearing a button down shirt — and absolutely nothing else.
6. When they save you leftovers.
7. When you get flowers delivered to your work and don’t even have to ask where they came from.
8. When you are getting on a train together and they put their hand on the small of your back, just for a second.
9. When you can tell they are really listening.
10. When they know what size you wear.
11. When they tell you that they want to wait, too, and you know it’s not a line.
12. When they aren’t too ashamed or too bashful to carry your purse.
13. When they aren’t too macho or too proud to let you pick up the check.
14. When they don’t need you to be perfect, they just need you to be you.
15. When they remembered to put the toilet seat down.
16. When you’re flirting with someone and they notice you have a tattoo, then know what it means without you explaining it to them.
17. When they kiss you in the middle of a sentence.
18. When they aren’t afraid to show you affection or tell you they love you around other people.
19. When you walk in and they are on the phone with your mother…and laughing.
20. When you wake up and you are still in their arms, even after a night of endless tossing and turning.
21. When you stub your toe or hurt yourself in a way that clearly isn’t life threatening, but they still ask if you are okay.
22. When you can tell they are about to say “I love you” but are too scared to say it — because they really want you to say it back.
23. When you go to the restroom and they order you another cup of coffee, because they know you well enough to know that more coffee is always the right answer.
24. When they become friends with your friends.
25. When they will go to a movie that you know they are going to hate, only because you wanted to see it.
26. When they don’t notice the incredibly hot person across from you because they’re too busy looking at you.
27. When they remind YOU of your anniversary.
28. When they tell you they were wrong.
29. When you leave your toothbrush in their apartment — on “accident” — and then find it in the holder, right next to theirs.
30. When they are willing to cry in front of you.
31. When they actually look into your eyes.
32. When you go to a restaurant and they pour your glass of water for you.
33. When they know what you are going to say, right before you say it.
34. When they’re wearing your sweatshirt or running shorts.
35. When they’re already gone by the time you wake up and leave a little note for you to remind you to have a great day.
36. When they introduce you as “my _____friend” for the first time.
37. When they actually read that book you recommended.
38. When they make a joke that they know only you will get.
39. When they remember a random fact about yourself you barely remembered yourself.
40. When they tell you that they understand how hard you work.
41. When they ask you how your day was, and they really want to know.
Nico Lang is the Co-Creator and Co-Editor of In Our Words and a graduate student in DePaul University’s Media & Cinema Studies program. Lang is a Change Coordinator for LGBT Change, the Co-Founder of Chicago’s Queer Intercollegiate Alliance and a columnist for HEAVEMedia. At HEAVE, Nico writes a column on film called Found Footage and talks about nerd stuff on a weekly podcast called Pod People. Elsewhere in podcasting, Lang hosts Broad Shoulders, a monthly podcast for Chicago’s Live Lit community. Nico is also a contributor at Thought Catalog and the Huffington Post and has been featured in the Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, LA Times, The New Gay, The Guardian and on their mother’s refrigerator. Follow Nico on Twitter @Nico_Lang or on the Facebook.