by: Sophie Turton
Note: This was read by the author at her mother’s wedding.
It cannot and will not always be easy; indeed not forever beautiful, exciting or bright. But through honest knowledge of what truly makes you and me, it will be truthful and kind. Love is not an oil painting, perfect in intention and design; it is not static and will not mean the exact thing tomorrow that is meant today. Just as the cells of our bodies are ever evolving, so too are our minds. You may see bright red, while I am sure of a burnt umber, this should not matter, for when we both agree that the colour is beautiful, we do not have to share the reason why. Through standing back to back, each with our own 180 degree view of the world, together, we complete the circle; we inform each other, we grow from each other. Love does not seek to control another.
Love is disagreeing, not always knowing the initial intention of the other, but accepting this with an open heart and mind and respecting another’s perspective enough to really hear when you listen. Love should not be blind.
We each live our lives to a unique rhythm, a kind of beat, like a drum. Love is finding someone who harmonizes, never drowns out or attempts to silence. Love is not saying exactly the right thing every single time, it is listening and understanding the rhythm and noticing when it changes. Love is saying no. Love is not pushing for a second no. Love is being with someone with whom it is completely safe to be exactly who you are. Your name is safe in their mouth. Your quirks are safe in their heart.